Yesterday, as I was browsing through one of my friends’ Orkut profiles, I came across something interesting. He had learned from his past relationships that ‘All people are basically good. It just requires a little bit of effort to bring out the best from each one’.
It caught my attention immediately and one look at it and I exclaimed to myself ' INTERESTING !!!' I pondered over it for a long time and I inferred quite a lot as I could relate to many past incidents and it was indeed, a learning experience.
As I finished reading that phrase of his, people who appeared cruel, arrogant and who deserved only a bad conduct certificate came to my mind. People who first deserved one but later bettered their impression on me came next. Just then, I started contemplating and felt what he had learned was 100% true. It first called for putting an end to the JUMPING-TO-CONCLUSIONS attitude of mine. Next, it called for patience, politeness and practicality. It spoke of the optimism embedded and the benevolence. As I went deeper, I felt the need to look at people with a broad mind forgetting any of the unfortunate incidents of the recent past and build an after-all-a-human-being perspective.
There’ve been days when I’ve pulled up a straight face at people who had failed to impress me on the first occasion. If not impress, they would have been those who had just not been my kinda people. And when I meet them for the second time, unpleasant memories of our previous meet flash across my mind and I get uneasy and don’t actually portray my own self. An indifferent attitude to a lively conversation might make the relationship bitterer and hence facilitate in creating a bad impression of me thereby leading to a breakaway of relationship before it could actually take off. Practical difficulties or situations may have made them behave in a way that annoyed me. A broad-minded perspective of things is very much needed in anything and I must understand the fact that everybody is good at one thing or the other.
So, all people are basically good. Now, what I inferred from ‘It just requires a little bit of effort to bring out the best from each one’ is this. I felt the need to be patient and wait for people to give their best. To make me understand this better, I brought to my mind some of Rahul Dravid’s finest innings which made him earn ‘The Wall’ tag. To many people, his batting looks boring at the beginning but as we wait, just like him, we start enjoying his style of play, those exquisite cover drives and the flamboyant flick off the legs. That bit of effort we put is, to wait for him give his best and the effort Dravid puts is, to understand the wicket better and that will make him give his best and we are provided with one of the best batting performances. To cite one example, I would like you to rewind to the 2003 Adelaide test where Dravid’s master-class 233 not out won the test for India and level the series 1-1. It was a proud feeling to beat the Kangaroos at their backyard and when it did happen, as a fan, I was happy like never before.
Now as I had said, practicality is another factor. People may have been forced to behave a little harsh on you but that doesn’t make them rude every time. Being rude is just one example but this is the one that annoys people many a times, or at least me to say the least. Other instances may have been on occasions when the second person may not have performed to the levels of your expectations. A hearty talk or exchange of polite words would have definitely helped but when we fail to do that, things never seem to get better.
So let’s be patient, polite and above all, optimistic. We’re sure to get better and better and make people give their best. This will definitely make us live life at its best and it's indeed a FEEL-GOOD factor.
I truly agree with my friend’s view that ‘All people are basically good. It just requires a little bit of effort to bring out the best from each one’
38 comments:
dats a great observation... n very true.. wenever sumone annoys u or acts in a way u dont want him or her to, jus put urself in dat person's position n analyze.. probably u ll understand y dat person's acting in dat way... dis is wat i hve followed most of my life.. n it has helped me a lot too...
another thing is prejudice.. which we all hve inside us.. its bad to judge ppl without knowin them... if we cud eliminate dis quality d world wud b a much better place to live in...
ur post conveys a very important mesg.. well written as usual.. its amazing how u can relate to such minute things n put them into such beautiful words... keep writing!!!
@Mona
Thanks a lot...glad u read it first...and yeah I read into the smallest of things...its always nice to learn from these things and they make u get better in life
its good post ...well written
and the example of rahul dravid to convey that peice of information was truly appreciable .....
and yeah it is good to learn from these things and they wud definitely make us better in life...
alltogether it was a ncie post :)
btw blog updated
@Solitary
Yup...when I read the post after posting, I myself appreciated that anecdote...glad u too enjoyed... The Wall roccczzzz anytime
hmm, happy realization.
but thr r so many stereotypes n generalizations tht it is very difficult to ignore stuff n not make an opinion of people. But i like the points raised.
:-) good job
Am reminded of a quote i read somewhere... [the words are not exact here, just the meaning:)]
Walk a mile in another man's shoes, so that by the end of it, when he wants it, it will be on your feet, and you'll be a mile away...:)
Do excuse me, for that pj.:) That was the first thing that popped into my mind, but this post gets really introspective, and leads up to the realization very clearly and logically. Good thinking and good expression.
Definitely, I'd agree with you on the value of accepting people the way they are, and appreciating the goodness that is there, with patience and perseverance. Still, one is human after all, and it takes time. It is commendable however, that you should speak of it in such an easy and open manner. Not many would!
Interesting, and more. Highly appreciated too! This post is!
that was a lovely post
yes.. all of us are good.. just that only very few ppl can bring out the best in us..or the good that we have from with in..to be brought out..
its all about not expecting much.. and just accepting ppl for the way they are.. once thats done.. then everything else falls in to place..
have a lovely sunday now..
good post there!!
it is very true. everyone is good or has some good inside. its a matter of perceiving it selflessly!!
;-))
loved the post.we often don't give others a chance.life's too short to hate,so just love life.lovely post again!!
just visit my blog,something interesting mite catch ur eye..
Goodness is a virtue that everyone posesses, but its also a virtue that possesses very few!
If you dont get that line, i'll xplane!
:)
Good post. Very honest. And I must tell you that it takes a lot of courage to accept and face ones own shortcomings, when the entire world is behind pulling the other person down. What you said is cent percent true. All it takes for a great fulfilling relationship is a little patience and perseverance. Keep up the good work!
@Express
So U liked it??? Fine...fine..
@Usha
That was an interesting quote...maybe I'll ponder over it and come up with another blog????
and yeah....glad u liked it...thanks 4 the appreciation...
@Ani
Yeah...thanks....it was something similar and along the lines of ur thinking...of late, i find urs philosophical...if not that deep, mine was at least half as philosophical as urs...right???
Anyway happy i cud come up wit something like this
@Deepsat
Exactly!!!Its abt perceptions
@Anwesa
Yeah...life is indeed short for these things but looks bigger and enjoyable once u start taking things in the stride
@Riversoul
Could infer a little....could u elaborate to get things right???
@Tara
Yeah...'ve been honest to my readers and yeah...I do have the courage...thanks anyways
dat is it !! weter som1 hate u or hurt u or not...each & evry soul here is basically swweethearts, may nt be 4 u or me ...but to som1 atleast.
@Enchanted
That's another way of interpreting this...but interesting...must say..
well m a bit of a pessimist... i think all people have somen bad in them, and it usually shows itself before the good....
ha ha ha
u were philosophical.. nothing is deep.. its how u take it to be.. u think its deep.. and meaningful.. then it is..
its all in the mind..
ahan!!!
a very true post..patience is indeed wat is needed to grow a relation..(thou i suck at it.. :P)
its gud that u can read btwn the lines n put them intoo beautiful words here..
um sure even the one who has written this on his profile..wudnt hav thot so much about this...
good read
\,,/ cheerz!!
lv:nickku
dude.. totally agree wid u.. it's just a matter of perception.. have been practicing this for quite sometime now.. close to 6 months i guess.. has worked wonders for me...!!! feels great..
Also give yourself time to think,, the other person time to realise..take a deep breath before you react..!!!
well penned..
Cheers..!!!
S
Optimistic. Yes, this is the operative word :)
I agree, all ppl are indeed basically good, we just have to endure patience (I'm glad ppl are patient w/ me) :D
@Everything
Jahnabi always thinks the other way around!!!!
@Ani
Oh...yeah....thats right...I agree
@Nikitha
Oh!!! Thanks a lot...beautiful words is it??? thanks...thanks..yup patience is definitely needed
@.S
Yeah...well said...u r right...we gotta give time for the other time
and thanks for dropping by
@Still thinking
u seem to be just the opposite of Everything burns?? :)
the first word that came out of me while reading this post is 'wowwww INTERESTING'.... even while reading the post faces of diff. people n d varied memories they have created flashed in front of my eyes. and wen i completed reading...i said to myself that "yes! All people are basically good. It just requires a little bit of effort to bring out the best from each one’
P.S missing u in my blog.
It such a coincidence that you mentioned this because just a day ago, I was trying to convince a friend of mine the same thing who thinks that some people are just born bad.
Cool post :-)
i completely bliv tht... ppl are basically grey depends which side is turned towards u :D
I thought you wud say s'thing good about me, but then again you took the string of words to 'Everything Burns'...hahaha... I'm kidding.
I actually had to read what she wrote, she ain't that wrong and btw, I talked abt ppl and not me - didn't you see the paranthesis :D
You're an optimist Rajesh and stay like that, I like this quality about you very much and it translates through your blog :)
@Preethilatha
Which means my post reached u and thats exactly way every writer expects from his readers...thanks thanks..
Will drop in soon :)
@Raaji
Welcome back...oh...that was a gr8 co-incidence...timely..!!!!
@Amritha
Exactly!!! Well said :)
@Still thinking
Well....not saying good words here was not intentional....was jus replyin 2 ur comment....when I saw Optimist, I was reminded of Everything Burns who called herself a pessimist..yeah....i did see the parenthesis...hee..heee
And yeah thanks for liking my Optimistic part...ll make sure I stay optimistic forever (atleast for u )... :)
hmmm.. reminds me of a Randy Pausche quote "Find the best in everybody. Just keep waiting no matter how long it takes. No one is all evil. Everybody has a good side, just keep waiting, it will come out" - most times its our own perceived notions that makes people good or bad
@Anu
Yeah...exactly....its our own perceived notions that makes people good or bad...and the quote seems interesting...QUITE INTERESTING...
ah so true
walkin in sum1 elses show isnt wt we often do n well more often thn not, its sumthn we cant do.
M impressed :)
absolutely true...! itz all a matter f perspectives!! loved this write!!
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