T20 - Shreya Special 2

The Top 10..

10. Jaadhu Hai Nasha (Jism)

On listening to this song, I arrived at the equation Jaadhu + Nasha = Shreya Ghoshal. Wow! What a rendition! It’s a blessing for the Filmfare award to have landed itself at the hands of Ms. Ghoshal. Just like Saansein Madham, she improvises in the 2nd stanza and it’s simply magic. Not everybody has the innate talent to bring out so much warmth and this is where we feel divinity in music. They say, certain things in life needed to be experienced and not analyzed. This song exemplifies the same and I leave it for experience and not elaborate any further.

Favorite Line: Baahon Mein Teri Yun Kho Gaye Hai (2nd stanza)

9. Barso Re (Guru)

Shreya’s long time due for a tie-up with Rahman for a Hindi number got over with Barso Re. This song swept awards at all functions and I would rate it as one of the best songs of 2007. This is the effect a song has when two Music Messiahs – Rahman and Shreya come together. She has really given her ALL and that was evident when she sang ‘Nan Naa Re Nan Naa Re’.

Favorite Line: Nan Naa Re Nan Naa Re

8. Teri Ore (Singh is King)

I wonder if mellifluousness can get any better. No! It can’t get better than this. This song has given me warmth of the highest order. It has got me relieved of distress and made my life look more beautiful and colorful. The hoarsest in Rahat’s voice complemented Shreya’s and she’d added a new dimension to the song. This was one of the few songs to which I can listen for one hour, non-stop.

Favorite line: Teri Ore Teri Ore Hai Rabba……

7. Ishq Hua (Aaja Nachle)

This is the best example of the pathetic nature of Indian Music and films – the dependence of the former on the latter. Due to lack of publicity for this song and the movie’s colossal flop restricted the reach of this song to a wider audience. Undoubtedly, this is one of the best songs Shreya has ever sung and ironically, happens to the most under-rated. The Sonu-Shreya combo brings back memories of some really mellifluous numbers of the past. A wonderful composition backed by a superb rendition.

Favorite Line: Nazron Ko Sambhaalein, To Dil Ka Kya Karein

6. Tere Naina (CC2C)

I fear if this song will fall into the league where Ishq Hua belongs to. This is another song that has the characteristics which Ishq Hua had – bad publicity of the song and the movie’s colossal flop. This song was a real test for Shreya to match up to Shankar and she’s played her part perfectly. The composition is terrific – the speed of the song varies like ‘never-heard-before’. While majority of the faster part is taken care of by Shreya, she makes sure, they are not done at the expense of the lyrics and the diction is just spot on, especially in the second stanza when she sings 4-5 lines continuously.

Favorite Line: Mere Dil Mein Jo Armaan Hai Paaas Aake Zara Dekho Na…

5. Silsila Ye Chaahat (Devdas)

Reason for my liking can be attributed to just one – it was Shreya who sang. In the sense, nobody else could have produced that magic at such a young age especially when she sings ‘O Piya’. I liked the song so much that I wanted to see its video and since I had never seen Devdas, I downloaded the movie just to watch this song. When I did watch, I was moved to see that sync between Ash’s facial beauty and Shreya vocal beauty. A wonderful song and its best enjoyed when listened to, using headphones and not speakers.

Favorite Line: Phir Se Baadhal Ghar Jaa Hey………….O Piya Yeh Diya…..

4. Beiri Piya (Devdas)

The ranking of Silsila and Beiri Piya was a close call but I rank Beiri Piya higher just for two reasons – it won Shreya a national award and it had that amazing ‘ISSSHHH’. This just goes to show Shreya’s self-competition right from her first film. This is one of the best romantic melodies ever composed and for a teenage girl to sing the same alongside a veteran like Udit and win the national award just goes to show her brilliance. The ‘ISSHH’ announces the arrival of a legend-in-the-making, call for silence - make you listen to this melody queen with rapt attention.

Favorite Line: Tu Dhoor…..Paas hi ta ab pass hai tu dhoor….Hey kyun…Ha aaa…

3. Tu Meri Dost Hai (Yuvvraaj)

This is Shreya’s first duet with Benny Dayal, who had delivered some terrific Tamil songs before Dost happened. Shreya makes entry 2.5 minutes into the song with ‘Raat Mein’ and ironically, lightens up the song with a light shake of her divine vocal chords. Her last stanza with Rahman is mind-blowing and one couldn’t have expected for anything better. The line ‘Ek Pari Gujrati Hain’ in the last stanza is just Wow!!! And her rendition is a rendition is something her contemporaries can only enjoy and can’t actually replicate. 

Favorite Line: ‘Jahan Shaam Utarti Hain…’ (The last stanza with Rahman– Wow!)

2. Ek Pal Ke Liye (Ankahee)

This was my most favorite till recently. This song has been giving me goose bumps ever since I first listened to it. I would say, this was one song which made me look up to this doyen to Indian Music. There’s something in this song that makes me listen to it every time I turn on my music system. One thing I confirmed with this song is, Shreya Ghoshal improvises with time and her second stanzas in all songs outsmart her first. This song draws you forward, and the song is best enjoyed when she sings ‘Phir Kya Ho Kya Kabar’. Mind-blowing! I feel bad to rate it second because it deserves a first place 

Winning the T20 cricket World Cup is very tough and to select The Best song of this T20 demanded efforts of the highest order and so much thought 

And the winner is……

1. Kaise Mujhe (Ghajini)

There have been songs when Shreya has sang solo numbers and entertained us so well but this song when she just flashes across our ears for a few seconds and leaves a lasting impact. Terrific! That is the trademark of a legend - quality is independent of quantity. I’ve witnessed a similar impact in songs like Mein Agar Kahoon and Teri Yaadon Mein where she outsmarts Sonu and KK respectively. Now, this is the turn of Benny Dayal to face the music. The way she starts ‘Aaaaaaa…..’ makes one get softer at heart, feel more sympathetic and look at life with a broad-minded perspective. To watch this song on screen, you end up getting your cheeks moist involuntarily – Yeh Shreya ki Jaadhu. 

Those few seconds when you flash across our ears like an angel are my favorite lines.

I pray God to bestow you with good health and happiness. Keep entertaining us and I wish, you sing better songs and I would like Ek Pal Ke Liye and Kaise Mujhe to drop down places next year.

P.S: Being a die-hard fan, I would also like to do some constructive criticism. The song ‘Poovinai’ from the Tamil film Ananda Thaandavam is one of the best melodies composed in recent times and hats off to you for the rendition. But I found something unusual, though you’re appreciated for perfection in Tamil diction even by stalwarts like S.P.B, a few lines in the first stanza looked out of place and I couldn’t understand what the lyrics were. I’m sorry if that was offending but this was just to make sure your reputation doesn’t get affected by even 0.1%.

T20 - Shreya Special 1

I'm still between Heaven & Earth and unable to think of anything else to pen down - the meet with Shreya still haunts mesmerically. On requests from a few friends, I now post the article which I had presented Shreya on 31st Jan 2009 and it is for this that she has promised to mail me back after reading. I split them into couple of parts and here is the first. Here we go... 

Shreya Ghoshal songs mean The Best and to select just 20 of The Best demands so much effort. It did get really tough when I involved myself with the task of doing the same but the toughness was something I thoroughly enjoyed and I attribute this sweet bitterness to my love for her songs. Despite the love, the last thing I had wanted was confusion and ironically, that happened first as soon as I ranked the songs of my choice. The sheet of paper on which I had ranked had all scribbling possible and the ranks kept changing every minute and it was utter chaos, to say the least. Even mathematics or physics problems that I had solved in the past never had so much of scribbling. Here I go with the rankings and a short description for my liking.

20. Pyaar Ki Ek Kahani (Krissh)

      

To rank a song as good as Pyaar Ki Ek Kahani at the 20th spot, it just goes to show the quality of Shreya Ghoshal songs, the lucidity in her rendition and the power of the voice to reach the audience, no matter who they’re. This song happened 3-4 years after her entry into film music and Ms. Ghoshal makes her entry into this song almost after 2 minutes with a hum and understandably, big things don’t happen just like that but grows on the audience slowly. With Sonu Nigam for company, it was wonderful to listen to them together and I feel, Shreya gives her best when she sings alongside someone as great as Sonu. In my opinion, this was the best among all Shreya songs of Krissh.

Favorite Line: Ek Tha Ladka Ek Thi Ladki Deewani (Wow! It draws you forward)

19. Shikdum (Dhoom)

      

Shaan happens to be one of my favorite singers and I loved his combo with Shreya and if I’m right, this was their song together. The song made for a wonderful melody, a class apart when the rest in that album were all hip-hop and rock type. It was a fast-paced melody and the childishness in Shreya’s voice was brought to the forefront and this was best evident in the below line.

Favorite Line: Achcha lo chalo, haari main haari Maan li sabhi baatein tumhaari  

18. Ta Ra Ra Ra Rum Rum (Ta Ra Rum Pum)

One of the best ever melodies I’ve ever listened to. The song could be best enjoyed when one is in a state of distress. The best way to start feeling-good is turn on the music system and play this song. The rest shall be taken care of, by Shreya Ghoshal. The best quality to be appreciated in her rendition is the fact that, she makes sure she understands your distress but at the same time, she makes sure you get relieved of it. Courtesy: Cuteness in her voice

Favorite Line: Ho agar kabhi koi ghum toh, bilkul na tum…

17. Dhoom Thaana (Om Shanti Om)

This song intensifies the debate whether if Shreya is the next Alka Yagnik/ Lata Mangeshkar. To fans like me, we’re happy if she’s Shreya Ghoshal and we don’t want her to be called with such names simply because she’s a class of her own and none shall ever come anywhere close to her perfection in diction or clarity in rendition. It intensifies the debate, in the sense, Shreya takes us back to 1970s and the feel is just perfect. She beautifies Padukone with the rendition and in the process, with the fast beats, makes you dance along with SRK and Padukone. This song exemplifies her versatility and affirms the fact that her voice is not confined just to melodies though she’s the BEST at it.

Favorite Line: Kaise Banjaara Mann Ki Baat Mein Aaye, Kaise Ek Raaja Ko Manmit Banaye Kaise Pehnu Main Pyar..

16. Kaash Ek Dhin (Showbiz)

This is another of her duets with Shaan. It’s such a lovely number and I don’t know if this song became that popular. Nevertheless the beauty of a song is completely independent of its popularity and the combo of Shreya and Shaan rocks big time. The song is equally divided between them and makes for a wonderful listen. While Shaan makes it fantastic in the first stanza, Shreya outsmarts him in the second and she does to the extent, I get so much lost with her in the second stanza that I begin to wonder from where did Shaan entered when he begins ‘Kaash Ek Dhin’.

Favorite Line: Mere Dil Ko Tum Churaake… (The full second stanza- no compromises)

15. Tu Kahaan Kho Gaya (U Bomsi and Me)

      

This song is special to me in a way that this alone could make me sleep at the times when I was beginning to have sleepless nights. In the sense, the slowness of the song, the laziness in the rendition, reluctance in the voice modulations made up for a soothe listen that it had the power to turn an insomniac to sleep. It’s a must listen but ironically, this never turned out to be a smash hit. Divine!

It’s Shreya all the way and hence, I find it tough to pick just one line.

14. Mere Dholna (Bhool Bhulaiyya)

Firstly I feel bad to place one of my favorites at the 14th position and the competition for places starts to get tougher as we move up. Needless to say, this is one of the best classical numbers to have been composed in Indian films and such a composition’s brilliance is appreciated only when it’s rendered someone as exceptional as Shreya and Sree Kumar. The ease with which she seemed to have rendered is just wow! Amazing!

Favorite Line: Saanson Mein Saanson Mein Teri Saragamein Hain, Abb Raat Din...

13. Mausam (Kidnap)

It’s amazing to note, a singer who had sung Mere Dholna and Tu Kahaan has sung this song. That’s Shreya Ghoshal for you! Versatility personified. Minisha Lamba’s bikini act wouldn’t have electrified the screen but for Shreya’s sensual rendition. This kind of a visual effect demands an aural boost and this was perfectly provided by Ms. Ghoshal. This rendition brought back memories of one of her numbers from Jism (Got it?)

Favorite Line: Na Na Na Na Na Na (Undoubtedly…sensual best)

12. Har Taraf (Saaya)

      

This is one of Anu Malik’s best compositions and this song showcases Shreya at her teenage best, both visually and aurally. Yes! Shreya Ghoshal makes a guest appearance in the song as a school student leading the choir. Her presences on the screen were moments when I started to compare her visual beauty to that in her voice. The protracted high pitches calls for so much talent and that seems to be quite abundant in her. Overall this is a song which enables a music lover to enjoy the sweetness in Shreya’s voice when she was in her teens. 

Favorite Line: Ye aasmaan ye zamin, chaand aur sooraj kyaa banaa sakaa hai kabhi 

11. Saansein Madham Hai (Kasak)

      

This song is the Hindi version of Nuvve Naa Shwaasa (Okariki Okaru) composed by M.M. Kreem. A soothing number and it’s one song one can listen to, anytime – however good/bad their mood is. With this song, Shreya has affirmed the fact that language is no barrier and that she shall produce the feel in any language – the tune alone shall do. This is one of my favorites and her improvisation in the 2nd stanza speaks volumes of the talent she possesses.

Favorite Line: Rehna mujhe hain teri panaaho mein rakhna tujhe hain..(2nd stanza)

The Top 10 to be posted next weekend...

A Heavenly Sojourn

When I purchased the red colored Adidas T-shirt from Shoppers Stop a few months back, I never thought I would wear the same on a day which shall mean the most to me. The bag I received from my college for organizing symposium events - I never expected it to accompany me on the day when I will feel like I'm in heaven. Yes! I’m posting this piece 46 hrs post my visit back to Earth from heaven. An event I had wished it happen before I could bid adieu to my fellow men on Earth happened, as early as day before yesterday - A 10 month dream turned into reality. Those were moments when I couldn’t differentiate between actuality and illusionary. Those were moments when I wondered if I had been gifted with special blessings from God. Yes! With special blessings from God, I had the opportunity to meet my Goddess – Playback singer Ms. Shreya Ghoshal.

I virtually sensed the heavenly moments when I purchased my ticket for the Shreya Ghoshal Live-in concert that was to be held at the Music Academy, Madras on the 31st of January 2009. Most fortunately, the sequence of events happened just the way I had wished it to and I actually wonder if God can ever be more kind to me. Hence firstly I would like to thank the Almighty for what has happened and then proceed with the narration of the most memorable (will always be the most memorable) evening of my life.

I made myself well-prepared (whether or not Shreya was, for the concert) with the list of things I had wanted to do. As soon as I purchased the concert ticket last Monday, I made it a point not to have a shave that week – 'grow as much beard and moustache as possible and then get the neatest one done on Saturday morning'. Apart from that, I documented another write-up about my admiration for Ms. Ghoshal’s music. This was done on Friday evening and I made sure, I gave my best amidst the flurry of messages friends sent – texting me names of heart specialists available in Madras if something should happen to me the next evening, out of uncontrollable excitement and joy. And as I had planned, I took a print out of the latest article I had written to present her for the evening and 2 copies of the article ‘Fallen in love….' wherein Shreya herself had commented. I also made sure I added that comment of hers at the end of the document to add 'THAT' special feel to it. One copy was taken for me to get her autograph - as a present by her and one as a gift I shall present, as a token of reverence. With all happening as planned, I rid my way to the auditorium half-hour ahead of time and gladly, was pleased to find another Shreya Ghoshal fan in the neighboring seat. We discussed a lot about the love and admiration both of us have for Shreya, our favorite songs etc.

As time passed, the star of the evening and the ever twinkling star of my heart – Shreya Ghoshal decorated the stage with her presence, entered on-stage and made her first angelic appearance in front of my 2 eagerly-awaiting eyes, which had always wondered if they could ever make use of themselves to see this child prodigy from close quarters. She started off with Silsila Yeh Chaahat (Devdas) and went on and on, non-stop for an hour and half. After a 20 minute break, she returned back and continued for another one and a half till 11.20 pm. Though her divinity-rich vocal chords were good enough to keep the audience enthusiastic and the mood thoroughly exciting, she reached us still better with her humble talk and the occasional display of her sense of humor. And despite preparing a list of songs for the evening, she heeded to the requests of the crowd and tried her best to go by what we wanted. That attitude of hers was amazing and I was completely bowled over when she said the following after singing ‘Agar Tum Mil Jao(Zeher). ‘I feel very good every time I come to Chennai because people here appreciate good music and I must confess, I loved the blog that was written by the guy from your Chennai’. Wow! Never in the wildest of my dreams did I expect her to make such a statement amidst 1000-seaters. Those words into my ears were equivalent to the pour of honey into my mouth and on listening to her appreciation; my heart got itself dissolved into these never-before-felt emotions. 

Her on-stage performance was mind-blowing - actually better than what I had expected, could say The Best ever. It's really worth penning down those songs, at least for people who didn’t have the opportunity to be there. They include her fluent rendition of the classical notes in Mere Dolna (Bhool Bhulaiyya), the ever-perfect Tamil diction while she sang Munbe Vaa (SOK) and the seductive stance she took while performing Jaadhu Hai Nasha (Jism). Another aspect of hers which I must mention is her command over the lyrics – she never used a lyric book to render hindi songs. What moved me was the pleasing nature with which she asked for pardon, well in advance, if she happens to mispronounce Thamizh (this was how she pronounced the word….wow!!) lyrics but that never happened with Munbe Va (a filmfare winner) but faltered a little while rendering Uruguthe (Veiyil). Some other songs which I found as perfect as the original include Ab to forever, Waada Raha, Yeh Ishq Hai, Pal pal har pal, Piyu Bole, Barso Re, Tu Meri Dost, Teri Ore, Tere Naina (on-stage debut at Chennai) and I’ll be doing injustice if I fail to mention 'Tujh Mein Rab Dhiktha hai' (Wow!! That was jussssssttttt toooooo good. I was stunned. At her vocal best!!). I'm a little sad that she didn't perform Kaise Mujhe (Ghajini) and Beiri Piya - while her mellifluous 'ISSHH' is my sms tone, 'Aaaaaa' from Kaise Mujhe is my ring tone.

She finished the concert brilliantly with Dola Re (another filmfare winner) and it was time for me to get into action. As soon as the concert ended, I ran up the stairs and stood in front of her on-stage. She smiled at me and I reciprocated with the biggest one possible. I took out the hard copy of ‘Fallen in Love….’ and showed her. She received it and questioned ‘What is this?’. I replied ‘A small gift for you – this is my article’. One look at the title, she started with a few divine sentences which still echoes in me and it’s getting pumped by the heart on and on, along with the blood. Below is what happened.

As she read the title of the article, she started "YOU ARE RAJESH? YOU ARE ONE PERSON I WANTED TO MEET. I’m HAPPY YOU’VE COME". She then told her Personal Manager ‘He is the person I was talking about' and then pointed to her fans waiting for autographs, ‘He is the blogger guy I was talking about, during the concert. He's written such a wonderful article’. I shook hands with her (Wow!!!) and finally managed to pump out a few words, spoke something in that sense of extreme excitement, told her, 'Shreya, it's a dream come true for me', she turned her eyes away from the sheets of paper I had given, looked at me. That one word she said, with such a sweet voice - it was an equivalent to a million. She said in her characteristic style, accompanied by the cutest smile ‘Aaahaan'. People waiting for autographs were pushed away but I alone stood next to her. I was just admiring the beauty - I didn't know what else to do (and was wondering if these things were real or illusion). As I was admiring her, she winked at me and said 'Please wait. I'll autograph'. She then autographed on the hard copy and accepted my request for a photo which was clicked by her Personal Manager. I was one of the very few who had the special privilege to take a photograph alongside her, in those 2 minutes. I presented her another of the article I had just written, on the eve of the concert. On receiving, she said 'Wow!!! Nice' and has also promised to e-mail me her reply. Despite the mention of my e-mail id, mobile number along with the articles and her promise to mail me, I'm so happy with just her words of promise - that meant the world to me. She passed on the sheets to her PM to let herself autograph. As she moved out of the hall into the car, I made sure I never moved away from her, tagged along and was pleased to find my sheets of paper alone, seated next to her inside the car. 

This was truly an experience I never have experienced in the past and it’ll call for something really BIG to come anywhere close to this and I can’t think of anything, as precious as this, happening in the near future.

Apart from God, I take this opportunity to thank the following people for making my dream come true (in the chronological order of events):

1. My cousin Divya and aunt who first made me take notice of the newspaper ad.

2. My parents for the financial support they provided to purchase the ticket.

3. My friend Muthu for allowing me to take his digicam.

Here are the photos. Do have a look at them.

I'll be doing injustice if I fail to convey my special thanks to that mysterious person who passed on 'Fallen in love...' article's link to Shreya. I'm waiting for the day when I could meet him/her. Thanks a lot!

Also, I would love Shreya to make a music album in the near future and definitely, that should be one of her long term goals and if it is one, I'm sure she'll look into the intricacies involved, work hard towards it and deliver one of the best ever possible. She actually deserves to make one for the talent she possesses - if not for her, at least for her millions of fans like me. My best wishes for the same.

The moments on-stage with Shreya provided euphoria of the highest order or at least, of an order I never have experienced. The odour of her perfume which hit me as hard as her ravishing looks still haunts mesmerically. Wow! It truly was A Heavenly Sojourn.

@Shreya

I conclude with a line from your song and I really mean it...

Tujh (Your music) Mein Rab Dhiktha Hai Yaara Mein Kya Karoon.. Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi (You and Music)

Embarrassing Moments - Part 2

As I just finish mentioning about the IT paper incident, I’m reminded of the 2 terrific days (in the negative sense) of my life. 

It was an October evening when I had just reached home from school. I screamed ‘Maa I’m hungry…what’s there for snacks? Else just get me a cup of Boost’ and the reply was, in a stern voice, ‘You may wait for sometime and for what you have been doing at school, you can’t expect a royal treatment’. That tone was unique in its own way – something I hadn’t heard in the past. ‘What wrong did I do?’ I asked to myself but before I could answer that, I posed to myself an honest question ‘What wrong did I not do?’. As I was coming to terms with the situation, mom came near and said ‘I want to talk to you tonight after Appa comes back from office’. I knew, something I had wished not to happen, has actually happened.

I carried with me, the cup of Boost - walked from the window to the door, from the door to the cupboard, from one cupboard to another, leaned on it, back to the door and then back to the window. The scene looked a vicious circle of despair. The drink 'Boost' may have been the secret of Sachin Tendulkar’s energy but in that state of mental agony, it certainly failed to provide me with the same. I was confused and just couldn’t figure out the exact nature of the situation. I didn’t want to make things worse and hence made sure, the TV was not switched on. I remember, the second academic term had just begun then and despite having no homework that day, I played safe by having books around me and kept staring at the faces of Indian freedom fighters on the pages of my history text. Time passed, dad arrived and when the clock was about to strike seven, mom and dad entered my room and shut the door. Though I didn’t make it explicit, I trembled with fear, inside.

Mom began ‘You know something? I got a call from your school Principal this evening?’. ‘What?’, I gasped. Yeah! Mom had received a call and my parents were instructed to meet the Principal, that following Saturday. I was shell-shocked to hear and mom questioned me, what wrong I had done over the past few weeks. Though I knew, I had done many, I felt they were never that foolishly done to reach the Principal’s ears. One tête-à-tête between us happened when I had hit the cricket ball into her cabin while practicing for the school team on campus and I thought it to be the reason behind the SPECIAL INVITE for my parents. Incidentally, I had a camp to attend that saturday and hence couldn’t accompany my parents to school. I couldn’t enjoy at the camp too and all my thinking was about the meet. I was trembling with fear all through the morning and I’m sure, any BP instrument would have showed a minimum 140/95. 

I came home in the evening, and that the meet was to inform my parents about my busyness in the exam hall confused me. Understandably, any student would be busy with his/her answer paper but the uniqueness lied in the fact that I had been too busy with my friends’ papers. When my mom first said this, I was confused. The reason being, though I had involved myself in malpractice almost in all exams that year, never was I caught red-handed. The explanations followed. A junior of mine had been watching my activities in the exam hall and had complained about this to the Principal. It was a rude shock and I couldn’t digest such a thing – the intrusion of a girl in my affairs. I felt the need to take that girl to task till I knew that she happened to be my cousin’s close friend. I had no other option but to stare at her, every time we met on campus and she used to hide from me everytime.

The second of incidents in this post and the last of the series is the dreadful fight among 3 of my friends and me. It all started with a late night online chat between me and my friend. The discussion about another friend, the biggest of communication gaps ever to exist, subsisted and ignited the spark to the verbal duels. The horrible thing was, two of the three happened to be my childhood friends. The sms and the conversations I made, the following afternoon still haunts me whenever I have the smallest of its remembrances. The meet with the first friend at his place and the verbal duel he had with the second, over the phone that noon are the worst you could expect of 20 year olds. Today, on retrospect, I feel very bad and its shame on my part to have been one of the two people to have started that infamous incident. Time is the healer and I’m sure, things shall get better and better. 

I feel good after having penned down what I had in me and my heart now weighs lighter. I’m not ashamed to write about what I was, and what I am today but I want to make sure, I write something much better, in future. I believe, the best of today shall make itself a wonderful past for tomorrow.

Embarrassing Moments - Part 1

In retrospect, I’m reminded of some of the most embarrassing moments of my life. While some sprout a chuckle now, some still hurt to an extent. Time is the healer and deservedly, the oldest of incidents belong to the former while the latest of them fall in the latter category. Penning them down shall relieve me of the ill-feelings, to an extent. This piece may turn some sympathetic while also proving to be a good entertainment for many thereby supplanting a laugh riot. I don’t mind both.

The oldest of them happened when I was in UKG. I still have a vague memory of that afternoon. There was this relative of mine, a 50 yr old man then, who seemed too harsh. Leave alone me, be it any child, had I been him, I wouldn’t have treated a child that harsh. Just because I had failed to answer the 'Camel' as the ship of the desert, he made me kneel down under the scorching sun and I was made to repeat that sentence at least 10 times. That hurt me, both physically and mentally and I was too small a child to have so much gut to speak against. It was embarrassing to get punished by an outsider but today, I pity me. Poor kid!

I had always felt insecure in the absence of my parents and though we live in a joint family, the comfort a child shares with his parents is unmatched. I was no exception and though I never felt 'mom-sick' and did go on tours with relatives, I had done so without realizing this insecurity I used to face, time and again. Even the smallest of scolding from relatives, in the absence of my parents, pained and hurt as bad as a tight slap on one’s cheeks. Though I hardly showed up any emotion, these gloom drops piled up to form an ocean of ill-feelings and the gloomy waters drained in a laminar fashion only after the re-union with my parents. As a kid, those were the toughest of times to face but I made sure, the ocean never produced a tsunami-like outburst. Looking back, just like the previous case, I pity me.

I still remember this particular incident when my Grandma questioned me in a 'slightly' higher tone as to why I had failed to shut the back gate of the house. That was unusual of her because she’s the kindest of people I’ve ever come across. That tone really bothered me so much that I started weeping. Tears rolled down involuntarily and it was so humiliating to cry amidst 8-9 people. All in my house, including grandma were shocked to see my reaction. In retrospect, I’m bowled over by the respect I had for her even at that young age ( I was, maybe 7 or 8 yrs old)  that I felt bad for such a small thing.

Another embarrassing incident happened while I was in class 9. The half-yearly IT papers were distributed to us and I had managed a mediocre 54 percent marks. Some students who had deserved better marks approached the teacher for re-correction and she was seen awarding them with more marks with no cross-checking. Sensing this, in an attempt to boost up my marks and with notoriety, I took a red ink pen from my friend’s bag, added more marks for many answers and complained the teacher of totaling error. Already carrying a 'notorious-character' certificate for passing sarcastic moments and having teased her, quite a lot during class hours, I was an exception there and she verified my paper alone. PANG! I had made the smallest of mistakes as the exact color of the red inks differed. While the ink she used was dark, mine was lighter. She questioned me if I had indulged in any sort of malpractice by correcting some answers myself but I stayed adamant by not admitting the fault. The drama gained momentum, news spread to neighbouring classes as she started screaming in a higher tone. Other teachers entered and having succumbed to the galloping pressure, I finally pleaded guilty. I was screwed badly with the class teacher jacking me left, right and center and I was asked to meet the Principal that evening. On retrospection, this passes off as yet another infamous act of mine, while in school and sometimes I feel proud to be part of this drama. The scenario then, was in complete contrast and I was shell-shocked, the moment I was instructed to meet the Principal that evening.

More of such incidents are lined up for next weekend. Watch out!!!

To be continued…

Resoluteness of Resolutions - Part 2

The moment I questioned myself if I was a good human-being, I pondered over the occasional short-tempered nature of mine. Yes! I’ve made a resolution that I wouldn’t lose my temper unnecessarily. Some readers may find it cliché but it’s a tough challenge and demands resoluteness of the highest order from my side. One may wonder whether a resoluteness of such high order is actually required. Well…such a thing is required for my character. Am I frightening you??? No! That’s not the intention. I’m just being very honest.

I’ve always pondered over the reasons that ignite that wildness in me and wondered if I do get paranoid at times. One thing I’ve realized, over the years is, in an attempt to win over someone by losing temper, we end up losing to our heart. Losing to my heart is something that has disturbed me, time and again. Despite the anger or the existing paranoia, if any, there’s that benevolent person living in one corner of every heart. And when that person, residing in my heart, responds to the wake up call, I start to repent for the misdeeds done. I have experienced this quite a few times in the past and the toughest thing for me is to prove my mind right against my heart and I guess that applies to many too. 

The best place to witness my short-tempered nature is on a cricket field. When a miss field happens off my bowling and especially when I’m in the middle of a good spell, I get wild. The wake up call to that benevolent man in me is not far away and he gets up just when I take the run up to bowl the next delivery. I ask to myself ‘Why did I lose temper? It was just one extra run’. That does sound perfect but it’s really tough to control myself at that instant when the fielder miss fields a straight forward chance. This was just one example and there’ve been many occasions. To be honest, I’ve shouted at my mom many a times and I most regret for the same. Sometimes, it’s the impatience to listen to her that calls for the anger/irritation. I wouldn’t use the term ‘ego’ because, there’s no need for such a thing between a son and his mom. But as I said, it’s just the lack of patience in me to wait for her to finish and before that, I would just shout and leave the place. A moment later, I would get back to her ‘What were you trying to say?’ and occasionally, when she questions the need for the impatience then, I would feel really, really guilty.

In my previous post, I had mentioned that the resoluteness shown by me was pretty decent and I still feel, it was not too bad an attempt though I did begin to lose temper occasionally. There was this class re-union we had planned on 2nd Jan and I was speaking with a couple of my schoolmates about the same. There was no co-operation from many and the attitude of a few really started to enrage me. I showed resolve and tried my best to not yell over the phone. But beyond a point, I felt, it started to get artificial and I just couldn't be my own self. In the sense, I feel I’m myself only when I put down my anger and let the other man know that I’m an expert at foul language :). Whatever! The main reason behind making such a resolution was just to make sure, my social inclinations remain as sound as it is, today. To be honest, I’m one of those few in my circle of friends who makes it a point to stay in touch with childhood friends. It’s not about storing contact numbers in the mobile, forwarding text messages, wishing friends on festival days etc. It’s about keeping the bond intact and sharing good comfort levels.

I fear, if this occasional short-tempered nature might just come in the way of future relationships. As we get older, we start to build self-esteem and want people to respect us. My losing temper unnecessarily may just balloon and pose to be an unwanted threat. So, I found the need for this small change in my attitude and thereby called for more patience to set things right for the better. I’ve come across books suggesting people to take a deep breath while they get angry and I can also remember a few 'so-called' Godmen telling people to count from 1 to 10 while they get angry. To be very frank, or if I confine to myself, it’s too tough to count numbers at a time when I'm enraged at something. Taking a deep breath really helps because, when we actually get angry, the heart starts to beat faster and that deep breath brings us back to normal and also gives that additional time TO WAKE UP THAT BENEVOLENT PERSON in oneself :)

This is a resolution I’ve taken from my heart and since it’s tough for me to work against my heart, I’m optimistic of the RESOLUTENESS OF THE RESOLUTION. I hope to continue with the same resolve and shall strive to become as patient as possible.

Resoluteness of Resolutions - Part 1

‘Thank God it’s over!’ This is how most of us would have exclaimed as the clock ticked 12 midnight on 31st December 2008 and that was when we knocked the doors of 2009 expecting a better year for all. A not-so-good year 2008 was, for many, from the poor to the rich, from laborers to CEOs, from citizens to politicians and from the unemployed to the employed. Precisely, it was actually a year when many employed turned unemployed.. The year also included that 366th day, proved many astrologers wrong and made sure, astrologers really believe in their predictions when they make the same on Jan 1 2009.

I exclaim once again ‘Thank God it’s over!’

The first question many ask me on New Year Day is ‘Any New Year Resolutions?’ and I would politely say ‘No… nothing’ with a smile that makes way for two small dimples on my cheeks. The truth is, I’ve never given a thought about something called ‘Resolution’. ‘Will I work towards my resolutions?’ This is a different question altogether but the point is, I’ve never given a thought about the resoluteness of resolutions. As I was in the middle of a train journey from Bangalore to Chennai on 1st morning, I just peeped out of the window to find wall posters of Mayawati who, of late seems to be on a mission to make her presence felt in the southern states. To be honest, the first question I posed to my inner self was ‘When will these politicians stop blemishing the walls?’ The questionnaire continued ‘When will a corrupt-free India come into being?’, ‘When will educated citizens enter Indian politics?’, ‘When will secularism win over communalism?’ ' When will peace win over terrorism?' and the list went on and on. I stopped for a moment and wondered over the utopian nature of my thoughts. I asked to myself ‘Am I a responsible citizen?’, ‘Before that, am I a good human being?’ and ‘What have I achieved in life to question people in higher echelons?’

I started to reply to the questions I threw at myself. As for ‘What have I achieved in life to question people in higher echelons?’ I felt it could be answered only in the coming years. I’m just 20 and I felt it would take at least 7-8 years to satisfy my expectations and to live up to the standards that I’ve set for myself. The question of me being a good human being is definitely a pre-requisite to being a responsible citizen. Am I a good human being? Well…that called for some introspection and another interesting thing that I discovered was the toughness associated with the coming of a satisfactory answer. The term ‘good’ is multi-faceted and what appears good to me may appear bad to another and vice-versa. Only something that is just short of utopian shall befit the term ‘good’ in the minds of all or at least many. And as I thought deeper, the tenacity of the good nature of the human is quite a task and circumstances do play a pivotal role. 

Sometimes too much thinking drives one away from the main topic and it’s better to confine to just one, analyze deep, draw conclusions and then move to the next. This exactly was what I failed to do and felt the then analysis just didn’t strike a chord with my latent thought ‘My New Year Resolutions’. Even now, it seems to have been at the back of my mind all this while as it is just here that I’m disclosing the thought’s latency. I wonder if I’m a lateral thinker, inadvertently but the indirection can’t be so indirect. Whatever! I felt the need to have one New Year resolution. I believe in CROSSING THE BRIDGE WHEN IT COMES but I also believe in making sure, I’m well equipped to cross at that time. Achievements will come only with time but I must make sure, I’m moving in the right direction and working towards the same. As a first step in that direction, I made one resolution on 1st and 3 days have passed till now, I’ve tried my best and it has not been a bad attempt. 

Well…it doesn’t call for a Jan 1 to make resolutions. It’s just another calendar date with 24 hours but being the first day of a calendar year, some people have made it a point to make resolutions and they TRY to live up to the same while some have made it a fashion to make resolutions. A lot depends on the seriousness of the individual and the necessity of that resolution. As far as I’m concerned, I’ve always wanted to make 'that' as a resolution no matter what the date was but it’s just that I got more serious on Jan 1 when I questioned somebody as popular as Ms. Mayawati. I contemplated and finally made a resolution for the first time in 20 years. Three days have passed and it’s been good. It’s not just the remaining 362 days that shall call for this resoluteness but the real test is to sustain that resoluteness through the rest of my life. I know it’s all in the mindset and as I've previously stated, a lot depends on the seriousness and of course, individual priorities. 

I’ve still not disclosed what 'that' resolution is. I'll keep it for the sequel to follow next weekend. Coffee Day claims 'A lot can happen over coffee' but for me, the tagline ‘A lot can happen over a train journey’ befits. Many thoughts have flashed across my mind during train journeys in the past too and MAYBE because, a train journey seems to be the perfect time for introspection. Maybe or is that the fact??? Well… ‘MAYBE A FACT’ :) :)

To be continued….

The only Chemistry I loved

“Re-write your Statement of Purpose (SoP). This is how you have to go to the US”, I quipped to my friend, a MS aspirant seated next to me. “Wow! See this guy. He’s truly a Man-on-a-Mission”, I continued unable to keep a check on my emotions. These excited remarks had a tinge of envy attached to it and deservedly, I was experiencing and watching something lovely. The reasons backing my emotions were quite preternatural and I wondered if fantasy could actually meet reality. If it could, then Life would be adored with an unprecedented beauty. As a reader, if you’re wondering where I was experiencing these wonderful emotions, it was the first show of the Tamil film ‘Vaaranam Aayiram’ featuring Surya and Sameera Reddy.

The protagonist is on his way to the US in search of his dream girl who’s pursuing MS at Berkley University, California. It was at this moment when I asked my friend to re-write his SoP to land in the US. The scenes that unfold on his arrival at California till intermission is a must-watch for any romantic movie buff. Though it’s quite hard to accept the storyline, it doesn’t contradict reality as much as the scenes in today’s movies where our so-called Heroes fly with agility from one skyscraper to another. Coming back to the movie, it’s a sincere attempt by a 20 year old Engineering graduate to SWEEP HIS GIRL OFF HER FEET. Being a 20 yr old Engineering graduate, I could relate to Surya’s emotions quite easily and to be honest, I felt it was worth the bucks to go in search of her. To the eyes of a 20 yr old, Sameera Reddy is buxom, full of life and creates a pang at your heart.

As soon as Surya landed at Sameera’s apartment and especially the moment after she offered him accommodation at her place, I exclaimed to myself ‘I really have something to watch if not experience’. To be honest, this kind of a life is what every teenage guy would love to lead, in a city as cosmopolitan as California and with a woman as sexy as Sameera. Hats off to the director and especially Surya for having cinematographed those scenes quite beautifully and it was indeed aesthetic. Surya deservedly, has carved a niche for himself as the Chocolate Boy of Tamil cinema. As he rightly admitted in one of the scenes “Spending 90 days with a girl in the US was as refreshing as an Ilayaraja song”. I’ve opined to quite a few of my friends (girls) that they look prettier in white salwars and this opinion of mine has been acknowledged by many when they've worn the same. On watching Sameera (clad in whites), on her way to Surya’s home, I exclaimed to myself “Will it ever happen to me?” Those whites were an icing on the cake and made Sameera more gorgeous.

The song “Adiyae Kolludhey” is beautifully pictured and the REFRESHING CHEMISTRY between the lead pair makes it a must-watch for any teenager. Admiring his girl’s beauty while she’s asleep, hugging the pillow on which she slept, added aestheticism to the already existing beauty of the scenes. Accompanying her almost everywhere she went, remaining jobless and staying in the same apartment by neither earning nor spending a penny, Surya has reveled in the belief ‘All is fair in love and war’. The scene where he accompanies her in the cab while she’s on her way for a project work was mind-blowing and it was too romantic a scene. I’ve always felt that romantic scenes best reach the audience when portrayed implicitly and it was a decent attempt by the lead pair. Beyond a point, I started to envy the man so hard that I wanted him brutally murdered because he seemed to have enjoyed much more than what was expected. Such was their love and it was well substantiated in the scenes.

Being chemistry avert, this was one exception I marveled at.

I take this opportunity to wish you a Happy and a Prosperous 2009 and sincerely wish to receive your continued support.